Category Archives: Daily life

Powerless

Yesterday our electricity was off for the whole day. THE WHOLE DAY! It was very much like living in the 15th century. Actually, it wasn’t too bad, just a bit chilly. The thing I noticed most of all was the way that my stupid 21st century brain doesn’t seem to recognise which of the modern innovations rely on electricity and which don’t. It took me hours to work out that I could light the gas hob with a match and boil all the water I could possibly want. On the other hand I picked up my phone at least a dozen times, presumably presuming that some kind of coal fired broadband connection was being trialled in my area.
I suppose this is the point that an incisive writer starts musing about the things we take for granted, and the way in which humanity adapts to new technology and quickly absorbs its capabilities as our own. Not me. I spent the whole morning swearing impotently at an absence of power, then went to a friend’s house to user some of his delicious electricity. Thus cleverly dodging any kind of lesson learning.
For the record, the outage had nothing to do with high winds, it was simply a dodgy fusebox. 5 minutes fiddling by a real man and it was fixed. At least that’s what my wife told me when she rang to say I could come home.

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Happy New Year

Hi. Hope you’re well. Yep, me too.

Firstly, what’s NYE? or HNY? Obviously I know, but there seems to have been a tipping point this year and these terms have replaced the fuller, and more sensical versions. It’s genuinely interesting to me how these things happen. First no one’s doing it, then some people that I clearly don’t know, then everyone. Then probably me next year.

A few years ago I forgot to send my Christmas cards in time and felt like the worst kind of twat for considering the possibility of emailing anyone a Christmas message. This year, I didn’t bother with most of my cards and felt genuinely pleased with myself that I bothered to make the effort to email people instead of simply posting it as my status on Facebook. Twitter obviously still doesn’t work for me as I only have about 30 followers and I don’t actually know any of them apart from one old friend from school who never posts and one bloke in the same village as me who I see most days anyway.

I don’t know if any of this matters one way or the other – although I suspect not – but it intrigues me that it happens, as though there are tides and currents in human interaction that seem to apply to us despite us not really understanding how. Languages evolve, new ideas and behaviours develop, these are in turn shocking, then accepted, then mainstream, then passe, then historical. Prejudices come and go, jokes become boring, then subversive. So HNY.

New Year’s resolutions. 1) Write more – blog everyday, spend time writing jokes, work on my book and try to catch all of the ideas that I habitually let go. Some of this might be worthwhile. Of course it might not, but I fearĀ  being 70 and realising that whatever I could have done, it’s probably too late now.

2) Be nicer to my kids. Someone gave my son a present at Christmas and he didn’t immediately pipe up with a cheery thankyou. I prompted him ‘What do you say?’ He looked at me dolefully and said ‘Sorry.’ This must change.

3) Eat better, drink more healthily and run more. All of these things make my life better.

4) Umm, that’s about it, apart from all the other obvious ones about watching less telly, being less lethagic etc.

Right that’s it. Back soon.